My Sister Was Carrying My Alpha's Fourth Pup, So I Left

On the day I was finally set to bond with Alric Thorne, my childhood sweetheart and the Alpha, he volunteered to endure 99 lashes to apologize to the entire pack for my inability to bear children. I was touched that he'd taken all the blame for me. Then, right in front of the entire pack, he announced that he would mark both me and my older sister, Yvette Hale. Alric kissed the tears from my cheek. "Sigrid, I'm only marking Yvette so she isn't giving me an heir for nothing! You're my only Luna!" That night, he spent two hours in my sister's room. The pain that burned through our mate bond nearly consumed me. After that, as if to make it up to me, he spent every day practicing archery and hunting with me. Even when my sister suffered severe postpartum bleeding, he didn't even visit her. And my sister never once set foot in the Alpha's hall on her own. I accepted the arrangement, hoping that once my sister gave birth to an heir, we could finally put an end to it. But seven years passed, and Yvette gave birth to three daughters, none of whom were eligible to inherit the Alpha title. Then one day, I overheard Osric, the pack healer, talking with Alric. "I've prepared another tonic for Yvette. I guarantee her next pup will be a girl, too. But are you sure the Luna won't get suspicious?" Alric paused. "Seven years, and she still insists on having her way. Why can't she be more like Yvette? At least Yvette knows her place. We're only doing this to spare her feelings. If she'd just step aside on her own, it would make things so much easier." My heart felt like it was bleeding. During the border war, I shielded him from three enemy arrows, taking every hit myself. Even with my wounds, I unleashed the last of my white wolf's power, saving his life and winning the battle. When I was on the brink of death, he kissed me, weeping as he swore he'd marry me if I would just open my eyes. He called to my wolf again and again until she finally woke. I lost the ability to have children, and I married into the Frostmoon pack with the honors I'd earned in the war. And after all that, all I got in return was a lie. The only one he had ever loved was my sister. I looked toward the distant mountains. My wolf and I lay weak beneath an old tree. I hadn't told him the truth: he didn't need to keep lying to me. I had barely a year left to live. Chapter 1 When my maid, Greta, brought in the tonic I had to drink every day, I told her to pour it out. She tried to stop me, close to tears. "Luna, what if the healer got it wrong? If you keep taking the medicine, your wolf might still hold on." "Then let me have it my way one last time." If there was one thing I'd never lacked in the past seven years, it was willfulness. The irony was that now, at the very end, I didn't even have the strength to knock the bowl over. When I asked Greta to pack my things, she sounded frantic. "Luna, the healer said you're not well enough to travel so far with your old injuries." I looked out the window. The mountains rose like a wall before me. I had never seen the sea. People said it was so wide it could hold the whole sky. While I could still walk, I wanted to go and see it. "I want to go to the sea." Greta froze. I opened my jewelry box and picked out everything Alric had given me over the years, one piece at a time. Pearl earrings. A sapphire brooch. And the moonstone necklace. "Pack these up and send them to Yvette." Greta picked up the moonstone necklace, her voice shaking. "Even this one?" I touched the necklace. The stone was as cold as my heart. Alric had put it on me himself right before our bonding ceremony. He had bent down and kissed my forehead. "This was my mother's. Wear it, and the whole Frostmoon pack will know you're the only Luna my family will ever accept." I'd mistaken every one of those gifts for love. Only later did I understand that he was simply grateful I'd saved his life on the battlefield. "Yes. Pack all of it. I'll take it to my sister myself." When I carried the wooden box into Yvette's courtyard, my three little nieces, Freya, Liv, and Nora, were practicing swordplay in the snow. I held out a wooden sword to Freya, the oldest. I'd stayed up all night carving it for her. She didn't take it. She just tipped her head back and looked up at me. "Do you keep making us things because you want pups of your own, Luna?" The courtyard went quiet. The maids nearby lowered their eyes, though they couldn't quite hide their smiles. I crouched down and brushed the snow off her shoulder. "Who told you that?" She pouted, her voice ringing out clearly. "Martha says you can't have pups yourself, so you're always hanging around us. "They also said if you ever have a pup, you'll kick us all out." The next second, she snatched the wooden sword and stomped on it, snapping it in two. "I don't want your things!" The wood broke with a sharp crack. Strangely, the pain in my chest no longer burned. It was like the last few embers of a fire going cold. Footsteps sounded behind me, along with the faint cedar scent that always clung to Alric. I used to love that scent. It reminded me of a winter morning, cold and clean. Now there was nothing left but the cold. Freya ran straight to him and threw her arms around his leg. "Father, the Luna was mean to me!" He patted her head before he even looked at me. "Why are you picking on a pup again?" I smiled. "I'm not picking on her." Alric glanced at the broken sword on the ground and frowned. "If you like pups so much, I'll have the girls spend more time with you in the main hall. Why bother trying to win them over with little trinkets like this? "If they actually took them, Yvette would be hurt." He had been like this for seven years. First he would let me do whatever I wanted. Then he would tell me how much it had hurt Yvette. As if everything I did was somehow an attempt to one-up my sister. He owed me his life, after all. He could never quite bring himself to tell me to leave. I nodded. "All right. I won't do it again." Alric froze for a second and looked me over as if I were a stranger. Then his eyes landed on the jewelry box in my hands, and his face darkened. "And what is this supposed to mean?" "I don't really like wearing jewelry," I said evenly. "So I brought it for my sister." "Sigrid." His voice turned colder. "Yvette just got pregnant, and you're throwing another tantrum? Insulting her with your castoffs?" For a long moment, I couldn't speak. "You've got it wrong. I just have no use for them, and I didn't want them to go to waste." Tears welled up in my eyes again. Alric was silent for a moment. Then he reached out and pulled my cloak tighter around me. The gesture came naturally, but he spoke to me as though I were a child who didn't know any better. "Go back to your room and stay there. No more running around. Once you've thought it over, I'll come see you." I stepped back, out of his reach. "There's no need. My sister just got pregnant. You should spend more time with her." Alric's expression hardened at once. He was about to say something when Yvette came out of the house. "Don't be angry, Alpha," she said softly. "Sigrid hasn't been feeling well lately. Of course she's in a bad mood." Yvette came over and gently stroked my face. "You're so pale. Your wounds need another soak in the moon spring. Let me arrange it for you." I looked up at her. Yvette gave me a tender smile and laid her palm over the back of my hand. "Be good and listen to your big sister. We're sisters. I would never do anything to hurt you." Chapter 2 The next evening, Yvette had a carriage ready for me. She came to see me off, her pregnant belly clearly showing. "I've booked the whole Greenpine Moon Spring for you. It's the biggest one in the North. Go and get some rest. "Don't worry about the Alpha. I'll talk to him for you and calm him down." I nodded and climbed in. The crunch of the wheels over the snow sounded like a farewell. Seven years ago, I had entered this estate as a decorated war hero, full of pride. Seven years later, they had worn me down until I became exactly what they wanted. I didn't even have the courage left to say goodbye. I looked back at the Alpha's estate one last time. The old tree by the gate had been eaten nearly hollow and had shed all its leaves early. Like me, it wouldn't put out a single new bud when spring came. Just go. Once the moon spring gave me a little strength back, it would be time to see the sea. The Greenpine Moon Spring was tucked away behind Greenpine Mountain. The maids left towels and a plate of fruit, scattered a few lily petals on the water, then disappeared into the drifting steam. The spring water reached my chest, its warmth spreading through my body as I slowly washed. The three arrow wounds were scars now. But the wolfsbane those arrows had carried deep into my body still sent waves of chills through me. I closed my eyes and sank all the way under. Out of nowhere, I wondered if all the tears I had cried over seven years could fill this spring. The surface of the water suddenly rippled. I broke the surface and opened my eyes. An unfamiliar man stood on the bank! I screamed and scrambled back. "Who are you?!" The scruffy man gave me a leering grin. "Didn't you pay me to come here, sweetheart? Why play innocent now?" I shot to my feet, grabbed my clothes off the bank, and tried to run. But he shifted into wolf form and lunged at me, cutting off my escape and pinning me against the edge of the spring. He leaned in, his foul breath washing over my face. With the last of my strength, I shifted and raked my claws across his chest, opening three bloody lines. He swore at me. "You filthy bitch!" Then he slammed me into the rock wall. Thud! My back went numb from the impact, and I tasted blood. Before I could get to my feet, torchlight flooded the bank. Alric walked slowly toward me, and the look in his eyes was cold enough to freeze my heart solid. Before the wolf could even turn around, Alric kicked him into the water, tore off his own cloak to wrap me in, and ordered his warriors to pin the wolf down. "Luna, someone reported that you were secretly meeting another male. I thought it was a false accusation." His gaze swept over me and finally settled on the wolf's neck. I followed his eyes and saw that the wolf was wearing my moonstone necklace! The same moonstone necklace I had left with my sister! Alric demanded through gritted teeth, "Why is he wearing that necklace?" My mind went blank. The wolf dropped to his knees at Alric's feet. "Alpha! The Luna gave me this necklace! She said if you could cheat on her, she could cheat on you too!" Alric unleashed a furious surge of Alpha power. My wolf was far too weak to withstand it. The force slammed into me all at once, and everything went black. Just before I lost consciousness, someone caught me in their arms. The familiar scent of cedar surrounded me. When I opened my eyes again, I was lying in my own bed. Alric stood at the window with his hands clasped behind his back, stiff and straight as a spear. Yvette sat at my bedside, holding my hand. "You're awake?" She sighed as if she could no longer hold it in. "Sigrid, I know you like to have your fun. Riding horses and hunting bears is one thing, but this time you've gone too far!" My ears rang. I couldn't believe my sister had set me up. I didn't want to believe it. She was my sister. We had grown up together. Crash! Alric smashed a vase. His eyes were bloodshot as he glared at me. A sharp pain went through my heart. I had wanted to leave, but not like this. "I don't know that wolf." I clutched the edge of the blanket. "And the necklace? Yesterday I—" I paused and looked at Yvette. "I gave it to my sister yesterday." Alric was taken aback. He turned to look at Yvette. Yvette sprang to her feet, her voice breaking. "What are you saying? That I'm the one who brought that wolf there? "I'm carrying a pup, and I still went to all the trouble of planning your trip. And this is how you repay me? By accusing me?" She was so upset that she swayed on her feet. Alric caught her right away. When he looked at me again, his eyes were as cold as the snow outside. "Sigrid! When are you going to learn to take responsibility for your own mistakes? Yvette isn't your scapegoat! She arranged a place for you to rest, and this is how you thank her?" I bit down hard on my lip until I tasted blood. Yvette leaned against his chest, still choked up. "Let it go. She's just upset that I'm having another pup, so she's taking it out on me." Alric scoffed. "It's a good thing she can't have pups. I can't imagine what a she-wolf that vicious would give birth to!" I went rigid. This was the man I had loved with everything I had. I had been wounded protecting him. And this was how he trampled on my dignity. "Under pack law, a Luna caught cheating is banished from our territory. But given your poor health, I'll be merciful." Alric spat the words out. I coughed. He reached for me on instinct, then stopped when Yvette let out a sob. "But I can't let you keep running wild, either. You'll be locked in the stone cell until you've thought about what you did." I looked at the two of them and gave a soft laugh. Nothing I said would make a difference. He had already decided I was guilty. Before the door of the stone cell was locked, he looked back at me one last time. "I've spoiled you for seven years! Even the most unruly child would have grown up by now! But you've only gotten worse! And now you've made me the laughingstock of the entire North by fooling around with some worthless rogue!" Tears streamed down my face. My chest heaved with sobs, but I couldn't get a single word out. Alric's eyes were ice. "Stop trying to fool me with your tears, Sigrid." The stone door slammed shut. I collapsed to the floor and coughed up blood. So that was all it had ever meant to him. My seven years of loving him with my whole heart were nothing but a joke. Chapter 3 I lay unconscious in the stone cell all night. When I came to, it was already light. The maid who brought my breakfast said Alric had stayed with Yvette all night. Apparently Yvette had suffered a terrible fright, so he'd kept the healer at her side until morning. And I had lain there alone, unconscious, in a pool of my own blood. Alric had sent Osric to check on me. The healer glanced at the blood on the floor, then quickly averted his eyes. He said my wolf's heart was still damaged from the old injury and told me to keep taking my medicine. Alric had given Yvette an entire night. All he left me was a bowl of stone-cold medicine. After a while, the door creaked open. It was Yvette. She had brought her three daughters to see me. Liv and Nora held their noses and whined, "It stinks in here. Can we go now?" "You're bad!" Freya shoved me hard. There was nothing timid or childlike in her eyes. "Why did you make up lies about my mom? Bad people like you should be locked up in here forever!" My back slammed into the wall, and I curled up in pain. Yvette stayed where she was and didn't stop them. Freya wasn't done. "You can't have pups, so you can't stand it when Mom's pregnant. "Father didn't sleep all night because of you. I wish you were dead!" I looked at her and suddenly remembered the high fever she'd had when she was two. I was the one who shifted into my white wolf and ran across three snowy mountains in a single night to bring back silverleaf to break her fever. She was so feverish she barely knew where she was, and the first word she ever said wasn't Mama. It was Auntie. After that, my sister stopped letting her cling to me. "If I really did die one day," I asked her softly, "would you be happy?" Freya didn't even hesitate. "Of course! Nobody wants you here!" A pup is a blank page. Adults decide what gets written on it. She wasn't the one at fault. Yvette and Alric were. "Yvette," I said, looking up at her, "you know perfectly well I gave you that necklace." Yvette smiled. She took the necklace out of her pocket and set it on the table by my hand. "Alric specifically asked me to return this to you." She paused, then drew out the words. "Looks like he still cares about you after all." I didn't reach for it. Yvette stood there a moment longer, then left with the girls. That evening, Alric sent word that I was to attend the full moon feast. The maid who brought the message stood in the doorway with her head bowed. "The Alpha says you're to wear the moonstone necklace." I changed into a clean dress and put on the necklace. At the feast, Alric poured the first glass of moon wine himself. By Frostmoon custom, the first glass went to the Luna. But he turned and handed it to Yvette. The hall fell quiet for a moment. Yvette took the wine and spoke softly. "Alpha, you're giving me the first glass? Won't Sigrid be upset?" Alric looked over at me. "What's there to be upset about? It's just a cup of wine. "Have I ever treated her badly in all these years?" No, he hadn't. Gems, furs, jewelry. He had given me plenty. He gave me everything money could buy. Everything except his heart. That belonged to Yvette. Yvette drank it down in one go. "Sigrid, toast Yvette." Alric lifted his chin at me. "Consider it your apology for last night." Suddenly, I didn't want to defend myself anymore. To him, the truth did not matter. Only what he chose to believe did. No matter what I said, in his eyes, I was guilty. I picked up the glass and walked over to Yvette. My throat suddenly tightened. The next second, a violent cough seized me. Wine spilled all over Yvette. She jerked back as if she'd been burned and nearly fell. Alric pulled her into his arms at once. "Alpha..." She clutched her stomach. "I think something's wrong..." Alric's face changed. "Get the healer, now!" he shouted. Several maids rushed over and hurried Yvette out. Alric turned back and fixed me with a cold stare. "You can't even hold a wine glass steady?" I looked down at my hands. They were still shaking. "I'm sorry. I'll apologize to my sister later." Alric looked taken aback. The old me had a hot temper. I would never have backed down and admitted I was wrong so quickly. What he didn't know was that I used to be headstrong because I still cared. Because I still had hope. I had cried, I had screamed, I had smashed things until the floor was covered in pieces. As I lost hope in him, my tears slowly gave way to silence. My indifference gave Alric nowhere to direct his anger. It was like throwing a punch with all his might, only to hit thin air. Yvette returned from the side hall, one hand still resting on her stomach, and tugged at his sleeve. "It's still snowing out there. Sigrid's wolf won't be able to take it." His voice hardened. "I've spoiled her for so long that she keeps taking my patience for granted." Alric suddenly grabbed my wrist. "Go kneel at the Moon Goddess's altar for an hour." His thumb pressed hard against my wrist bone, and he didn't let go even when I winced. "Think about what you've done before the feast ends." I didn't fight him. I only asked, "After the hour is up, can I leave the Frostmoon pack?" His fingers clamped down. "Where do you think you're going?" "To the sea." "No." He answered so quickly that he seemed to surprise himself. I looked at him. "I don't want to be the Frostmoon Luna anymore. And I don't want to stay here." "Sigrid!" Alric stepped into my path, his voice low. "You can't just decide to stop being Luna whenever you throw a tantrum. Unless I strip you of that title, you'll belong to the Frostmoon pack forever." I asked quietly, "And do I belong to you?" He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. A maid's panicked cry suddenly rang out from the side hall. "Alpha, Yvette's having terrible stomach pains!" Alric let go of me and headed straight for the side hall. Two steps later, he looked back. "Just one hour. "I'll come get you myself." I didn't answer. He stared at me for a moment, then went to the side hall after all. I took the moonstone necklace from around my neck, closed it in my fist, and walked alone through the snow to the Moon Goddess's altar. Chapter 4 The Moon Goddess's altar stood at the highest point of the estate. The wind flung snow against the stone steps. I held on to the edge of the altar and slowly lowered myself to my knees. I set the moonstone down in front of me. Seven years ago, when Alric put it on me himself, he had told the whole Frostmoon pack that he would always protect his Luna. That night, he took 99 lashes for me. The whip tore open his back. I threw my arms around him and begged him to stop trying to be so strong. He just wiped my tears away with his bloody hand. "Don't be scared. "As long as I'm Alpha of the Frostmoon pack, no one will ever send you away." I finally understood. He'd kept me as his Luna, but abandoned me long ago. I pulled the petition I'd already prepared to leave the pack from inside my cloak and pressed my thumbprint onto it with a trembling hand. Little by little, the moonlight crept across the altar. The hour was up. Alric never appeared at the bottom of the steps. Greta came running up through the snow, took off her cloak, and wrapped it around me. "Luna, Freya suddenly came down with a high fever. The Alpha and Yvette are both with her." She held my arm, her voice growing softer. "The Alpha ordered you to wait. He'll come get you once the pup's fever breaks." I glanced back at the long flight of steps. "Did he say how much longer?" Greta shook her head, fighting back tears. I pushed myself up against the altar and handed her the petition and the moonstone together. "Give these to him at dawn." "Where are you going?" "To see the sea." Greta clung to my sleeve. "You're in no condition to travel! Please, wait for the Alpha. Let him take you to the sea!" "I've waited long enough." I pried her fingers loose. "Greta, this is the last order I'll ever give you as your Luna. "Go back." Halvor, the guard at the east gate, stopped me. "No one leaves the territory on a full moon night without the Alpha's permission." I took the Luna seal from my belt and pressed it against his spear. "I'm still the Luna of the Frostmoon pack. "Open the gate." Halvor hesitated, then dropped to one knee and ordered the heavy iron gate pulled open. I took a light carriage from the stables and drove it myself. The wheels rolled over the snow and through the sleeping valley. I didn't look back. Just before dawn, the wind finally carried a faint, unfamiliar tang of salt. The carriage crested the last hill, and in the distance, waves were rolling toward the shore, one after another. The sea wind tugged my cloak open and lifted the weight that had been crushing my chest for days. I held on to the carriage shaft as I climbed down, then picked my way across the frosted rocks toward that endless blue. A wave rushed up and soaked the toes of my shoes. Deep inside me, the white wolf who had been sleeping for so long slowly lifted her head. I smiled at her. "We're here." She got unsteadily to her feet and took one step forward with me. A sudden pain stabbed through my chest. I collapsed onto the sand. The blood I coughed up was quickly washed away by the sea. Another wave rolled over the backs of my hands, then retreated. I used every bit of strength I had left to raise my head. The sea really was wide. So wide that no wall could hold it, and no one could order it to stop. I lay on the wet sand, listening to the waves, and slowly closed my eyes. This time, I would never have to wait for Alric again. Back at the estate, Freya's fever had just broken. Alric had just taken a bowl of medicine from the healer when a sudden, tearing pain shot through his chest. The bowl slipped from his fingers and shattered on the floor. He doubled over, clutching his chest. The mate bond that had connected them since the night of their bonding had suddenly snapped. Inside him, his wolf let out a long, agonized howl. "Sigrid..." Alric shot to his feet, pushed Yvette aside as she tried to help him, and bolted out of the room. The Moon Goddess's altar was empty. All that remained were two shallow dents where Sigrid had knelt. Fresh snow was already filling them. Greta was huddled at the bottom of the steps, clutching the moonstone and sobbing so hard her whole body shook. "The Luna's gone." Alric hauled her to her feet. "Where did she go?" "She said she was going to see the sea." The guards dragged Halvor over from the east gate. "The Luna ordered us to open the gate. She had her seal. We didn't dare disobey." "She's still injured, and you let her leave all by herself?!" Alric's roar woke the whole estate. Halvor pressed his forehead to the ground and didn't dare answer. Alric let go of Greta, steadied his shaking hands, and sent an order through the pack link to every wolf in Frostmoon. "Seal every mountain pass. "Everyone, move out. Search the eastern coast. "Bring the Luna home!" Howl after howl rose into the snowy night. Alric shifted into his black wolf and was the first one out the east gate. All that was left on the snow were two wheel tracks, already blurring in the wind. He followed the faint trace of her scent out of the territory, tumbled down a steep slope, and scrambled back up again. The hollow in his chest never filled. As daylight broke through the clouds, Leif, a pack warrior, came racing back from the coast. He shifted back into human form in front of Alric and dropped hard to his knees in the snow. "Alpha..." Alric shifted back into human form and grabbed him by the shoulders. "You found her?" Leif was shaking all over and couldn't bring himself to look up. "The Luna... "She's dead!"